noun, plural hi·a·tus·es, hi·a·tus.
I am currently battling with a lot of conflicting priorities in my life, and despite extended conversations with various time keepers including Father Time, my boss and my Mum; it would appear that there is no option other than to have only 24 hours in a day. As a grown up human being I am supposed to be able to deal with this in a calm and capable manner, but until there is an option for an extended day or even a pause button for life, it looks like I will continue to fail in my endeavours.
For the most part I try and keep real life off this blog, but here’s how it is: For the last four months my job has been utter chaos; we’ve been understaffed since May and I’ve been covering an additional post on top of my own brand new job that I started in June. Thankfully we now have a replacement staff member but this has segued neatly into the busiest time of year for us and a whole new flavour of madness. In addition to this I am attempting to plan a wedding (whoever knew it could be so complicated?!), I am getting more and more involved in Stonehaven Flood Action Group (after our house and the town was flooded in December 2012) and am still making a valiant attempt to keep up my training (Kielder Marathon is now less than one week away).
So I think you now see what’s coming… In the list above there is currently no room for blogging. After getting home after a long working day and commute then shooting off to some meeting or training session, I’m landing on the couch for half an hour after dinner before going to bed. The last thing I want to do is spend two more hours in front of a computer generating content that is worthy of posting here. Writing and blogging is something that I genuinely enjoy doing, so the fact that it has become another chore on a long list of ‘things to do’ is not good and it is contributing to a general feeling of unhappy overwhelmed-ness.
I was really disappointed I wasn’t able to document my training for Moray in greater detail over the summer, I’m disappointed I haven’t given my sub-4 marathon a more detailed analysis and I’m especially disappointed that I still haven’t found the time to finish my Support Report from the Glenmore 24 I started writing over 3 weeks ago. I don’t like half-assing things – I either do them well or I don’t do them at all and right now I’m falling short of my own expectations with this. I hate that my beloved blog has sat without addition or explanation since the 4th of last month and there’s a never-ending nagging voice in my head telling me to do something about it.
Some people update their blogs sporadically, but I’ve always tried to be consistent with mine and over the last three years I have built a great space for talking about running and have made many meaningful connections with people through here and social media. I can’t provide that level of consistency at the moment so I am going to take some time off blogging and begin again in 2014 to continue charting the next stages in my journey to my eventual goal, the 2015 West Highland Way race.
It actually really pains me to write this, but I’d rather just be clear about why I’m not writing any more than just have my blog peter out and fade away. I will still write a race report for the Kielder Marathon and for the Fraserburgh Half Marathon (my two remaining races of the year), and I am currently testing a pair of Salomon Speedcross 3 Trail shoes which I will review after Kielder, but other than that I’m afraid you can expect radio silence from Red Wine Runner, probably until the rest of the year is out. This is really hard, but I am at a breaking point and something has to concede to prolong my sanity.
So for now, a hiatus. A small pause, if you will. Small paws.
Thanks to all of you for reading; for your support, comments and emails over the last few years. I will be back, I promise.